Monday, January 21, 2013

What Not To Text To Women (or just me)

I have a Facebook Friend, actually she is a friend of a friend, who is posting about her dating life on her page. It is quite humorous and she even included screen shots of texts last night.

A couple days ago I was thinking of a post for men about what not to text women because of some texts I had just gotten but wanted to put some more thought into it. Don’t know why I wanted to think about it because for those of you who know me personally you know I talk to think. That in itself gets me into all sorts of trouble because random, honest shit just comes out my mouth and even I am surprised sometimes.

If you have sent me a text, don’t get nervous, I am not going to post your texts here, or at least one of you I won’t because I don’t want to set my laptop on fire. Oh my! That would make me turn 50 Shades of Red. Ok, back to the story before I get distracted and send him a text….

After meeting you for one drink we really don’t want or need your “I want you” text. If we had wanted you it would have been more than one drink. You left the bar, had a few more at home, watched some porn and sent text with one hand. No reply and blocked!

I can't speak for all women but I don't want an "I really think I love you" text after seeing you a couple times. I try to be kind with a reply that "I don't want a relationship at this time and maybe you should move along".

It is not only women who do the stereotypical drunk texting. My experience is that men tend to be pretty good at it. I get random texts from this guy I saw a couple times and he is either high, drunk, or nuts. I have to wonder why his thoughts go to me at that particular time, which is kind of spooky if you think about it.

Another tip is don’t send 5 texts the afternoon of a planned meeting saying how much you are looking forward to it. One will suffice as a confirmation. After 5 texts – cancelled date and blocked. You would be the one who would follow up with the “I want you” text and you would be blocked at that point anyway.

I am not admitting to any drunk texting but I did just install an app on my phone that prevents it. I don’t want to risk my texts as a screen shot showing up on someone’s Facebook page. Even with my drunk fingers I have not done any of the above mentioned - at least I don't think so.

Coffee and no alcohol is making me want to throw caution to the wind and text Mr. 50 Shades of Red so I will see you later.



  1. Well, how about, "yeah, I wasn't blown away, I doubt I ever would be, it was ok, you're still kinda cute but not a cute that I would take the time to get to know but...having said that, do you want to have sex anyway and I will then proceed to never contact you agian?" Hahahah ;) I wonder if honesty would ever work, I don't know what I would do if some woman texted me that.

    1. Maybe I will try that some time Bama and I will let you know how it works out.


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