Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Pity Party of One

I have had a few back to back shitty days lately including poking a stick in my eye. Shitty mainly because of my own mind though. Typically I will allow myself to sit on a pity pot for an hour or so at a time and then get over whatever has me in a funk. Allowed it to go on for a few days this time for some unknown reason.

That all changed this morning. God kicked me off the pot by putting someone in my path I needed at the right time.

I am a patient/family volunteer with my local Hospice organization because of my personal experiences with them. I met my new patient and family for the first time this morning. The main ‘player’ in this assignment is the daughter. When I pulled in to the driveway she was standing there waiting for me. I saw me on her face and in her eyes, the me from when I was caring for my mom before she died and the me when I was caring for my husband before he died. Only someone who has been there can understand those eyes. Reminded me of the important things and not the crap I have been thinking about.

She said God brought an angel to her this morning in me but what she will never know is that she was the angel God sent to me to tell me to get over myself and any trivial crap that has been on my mind.

I have been in need of a big hug while in my self induced pity party of one. Her hugs this morning were better than anything I thought I needed. I almost backed out of this assignment because I didn’t think my head was right for it. Sure am glad I didn’t.

Blessings are there if we just get outside of ourself. I am glad God keeps reminding me of that because it has brought some special people in my life. Special people like I met this morning whose life pretty much sucks right now because of what she is enduring.


Sunday, May 26, 2013

Meeting Miss Mary

At the beginning of the trail where I walk is a bench. This morning someone I had seen walking many times was sitting there, head leaned back, completely still. As I approached, reaching for my phone because I thought I may have to call 911, her eyes opened and she smiled at me with absolute radiance. I said good morning and her response was she was just sitting there listening to God’s wonder. Well, I couldn’t just pass by without comment so I replied good morning and told her I was a bit concerned when I saw her sitting so still. She laughed and told me her name was Mary and she had a lot of life left in her.

I just knew this was going to be a conversation I needed to have so I put off my walk and stood there talking to Miss Mary. What I learned about Miss Mary could be lessons for all of us.

      -        She believes in God.

-         Patriotism is important to her. Memorial Day is not a weekend,  it is the last Monday of May and she only celebrates it then no matter what Congress says.

-         She has been on this earth for 82 years. That shocked me because I see her walk most days and she does it at a pretty good pace. She appears to be as fit as me, maybe better. She walks at that pace for about an hour and a half each day. Her face doesn’t say 82 either.

-         She has never eaten fast food.

-         She doesn’t drink soft drinks because they are bad for you.

-         A glass of wine and listening to jazz with her boyfriend is a nightly ritual. I got the impression they may even be living together.

-         She makes out with her boyfriend every night. Her exact words were “passionately kisses” him. I suspect two things by the twinkle in her eye when she told me that; he is younger than her and they have sex frequently.

-         She grows her own vegetables because she doesn’t trust what comes from the grocery store.
-    She takes zero medications and is healthy.

I thought I wanted to be Betty White when I grew up but now I think I want to be Miss Mary. She is healthy and fit, makes out every night with her younger boyfriend, drinks good wine, listens to good music and is probably having sex on a regular basis.

Hell, I don’t want to wait until I grow up to be like Miss Mary….I want to be Miss Mary now!!!

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Are Men Really So Simple?

Are men really so simple minded?
The answer may just be yes.
There is the cliché about men not understanding women and all the jokes that seem to go with it.

I had been thinking I didn’t understand men so was sharing my thoughts with a male buddy. He informed me the only thing you need to understand about men is they like titties.  Big, little, store bought, whatever. Nothing else to know.
Is it really that simple?

Friday, May 3, 2013

I Am Going Naked

Getting ready for an event filled weekend that requires dressing up a bit is causing me to have to make lot’s of decisions this morning. I will be staying overnight at the event so that means I have to make decisions this morning for 2 days of clothing choices.

Good lord! If guys only knew what went into this process. I knew what I was wearing for the ‘main event’ on the outside. But you then have to choose the right under garments. My outerwear is a bit form fitting so that means you have to have just the right underwear including the right bra so there is no VPL or VBL. We all know what the VPL is but I have to be careful of the Visible Bra Line because my outfit is strapless and you don’t want any of that back fat being shoved upward for all to see. Since I have a pretty eye catching tattoo on my upper shoulder it would draw attention to VBL.

So outerwear and underwear decided. That is only the beginning. You then have to choose the right shoes. This event is resort casual they say. What the hell does that mean anyway? So you dress down your outerwear with the right jewelry and shoes. Stillettos are out so I am going with a 'casual wedge' so I can stand up for the entire evening and be comfortable in my “resort casual” attire.

Outerwear – check
Underwear – check
Shoes – check

Then comes the bag/clutch for your lipstick and cell phone and whatever else you want to take. Big decision after that is jewelry. I may have gone overboard throughout the years buying jewelry because there are too many choices.

Since I have long hair you have to make the decision of what to do with that. Hang straight down, a bit of curl or a low pony tail?

All these decisions are giving me a headache trying to determine what to pack.

I like dressing up but shit fire, can I just wear jeans, tshirt and flip flops? Fuck it....I am going naked. I don’t want to make these decisions this morning.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Friends Without Benefits?

Can straight men and straight women just be friends without sex being involved? I have had this conversation twice recently and my contribution to the debate was they absolutely could. I was challenged on my view point because I was told all men think about is sex. Well, buckaroo, women probably think about sex just as much as men but sometimes you just don’t let your relationship go there. I actually feel sorry for women who don't have a close male friend. They miss out on a lot of stuff.

I grew up between two brothers in a small town where the only kids near my age were boys. My best friends as a young child were my younger brother and Gary my neighbor. As I got into my teens I hung out with Gary, David and Joe. We were inseparable for a long time and got in to all sorts of mischief together. Because of that I was very good at being just one of the boys. That also meant I endured many belching and farting contests.

Now I have some really good buddies and one of my best friends happens to be male.  I have been asked more than once if we were friends with benefits….uh, nope. We both know that would probably screw up a great friendship so we won’t go there.  There is no agenda behind anything we say to each other which is so refreshing. Sex would get in the way of that.  

This country song kind of sums it up:
One Of The Boys

So yes, you can have close friendships with the opposite sex if you can be just one of the boys. Some women can’t do that because they are too much of a girly girl and can't hang.
Do you have a close friend of the opposite sex who is not gay and you are not having sex with them?